In the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic and presidential election, you would think the obvious solution, all of us working together, would happen instinctively. Instead, most of the reactions and actions have focused on blame. Hence the reasoning for this citizen’s frustration, and need to expose an underlying national condition that continues to feed the endless flow of local conflicts. Instead of the usual ‘fighting fire with fire’ or even “taking the high road’, I would like to offer a softer, possibly more effective point of view. A view thanks to some self reflection, humble beginnings, and new optimistic energy derived from an open perspective.
“These tragedies, in my opinion, were both historical, missed opportunities.”
These tragedies, in my opinion, were both historical, missed opportunities. Both agreeably toxic and sad, but most horrific was watching how many Americans reacted. And on that note, I will keep my promise to my wife and not point them all out (I like to expose con-artists, liars and bullies, the first step in making them accountable). What I am referring to is that these were simply missed opportunities for everyone to DO THE RIGHT THING – pretend that everyone else’s family is yours and apply your actions to that single emotional drive. What if we performed a national medical records search for COVID-19 high risk factors in January followed by a mandatory stay at home and quarantine for those who met those criteria? Yes, easy to state in retrospect, but what if we simply reacted nationally back then like we are reacting right now with our own loved ones at risk? Admittedly a tough national decision, but there is an a general public acceptance when it comes to family ‘tough love’. As for the election, no case scenario example needed there.
In all of our lives, there are a multitude of chances to do the right thing and have a better outcome. Being human guarantees that there will be a little or a lot of trial and error. The positive and spiritual end game is to reflect on the negative outcomes and embrace the positive ones. As a logical thinker, regret and/or blame do not help the situation, but you have to be ready for these inevitable reactions. What I cannot understand, is with all of our power, money and intellect, why don’t we put more time or energy into preparing for the next time? That small step to react initially with admitting that ‘it could have done better’, I believe, is key to pulling this nation back together.
“Like a drug, Narcissism is not the cause of someone’s condition but a vehicle in which to escape reality – Or oneself.”
Like a drug, Narcissism is not the cause of someone’s condition but a vehicle in which to escape reality – Or oneself. This ‘condition’ can have many forms and variations, mostly as a proper noun, “He or she is such a narcissist”. In my earlier blog Emotional Terrorism I list the 9 descriptors of the Narcissist Personality Disorder (NPD). We all exhibit one or two of these, most prevalent in our youth. There are studies in fact that state the development of the telencephalon (our distinctive homo sapiens fore brain) is not completely developed until our late 20s. Not an excuse in my opinion, but another means in which to prepare intelligently. Help our youth to under-react and provide a path to reward them for their intelligent efforts and effective, peaceful outcomes.
Another study illuminates our species’ peculiar knack to literally defend a bad decision. Admittedly that is my descriptive spin on it, but for this blog it is the most appropriate definition. What’s interesting is that the researchers theorize the way we rationalize our past decisions and actions is in reality a part of survival. The interesting take away was not focused so much on inappropriate actions or reactions, but the consistency of how we rationalize our actions. Or worse, how some deny their actions occurred entirely.
“.., how many of us reflect on our past, identify inappropriate decisions and then openly apologize for our actions?”
Oddly, this gave me some sort of comfort knowing there was a ‘reason’ behind these painful actions and reactions. Reading this article in a different time of my life (before I became a father and now a grandfather) would not have had the same impact. Although we all dip into that list of 9 narcissistic traits when we are young, how many of us reflect on our past, identify inappropriate decisions and then openly apologize for our actions? Sadly very few, but I have another theory and suggestion…. Maybe the negative abuse of the internet and personal transparency could be redirected to another, more positive task? To help our nation and youth to truly ‘evolve’ past both the bad decisions and unproductive reactions. Use these mediums to start pushing back on old survival instincts by attempting to understand them as our new intelligent exposure paradigm.
“Until we become better, wiser, stronger parents, our country and world will not change.”
On that note, there’s that love / hate relationship we all have with the media – another subject and blog in itself. I will boil it down to one statement using that gift the first amendment gives me to write this. Until we become better, wiser, stronger parents, our country and world will not change. Meaning, when an honorable family platform replaces the ratings, money and power in the media, we will heal and pull together as a nation. Easy to say and even harder to agree on how to go about it. But really doing something about it starts one person at a time. Hence my choice for the title of this blog.
As for ‘moving’ someone with one bit of prose, that too is useless without actually moving together one person, couple, family, city at a time. Admittedly, an almost obvious, plagiaristic ending and logical next step. But maybe a few more Saturday morning efforts like this can in some way make the real changes we need.